She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
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