I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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