CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize