Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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