google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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