glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
