i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
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