you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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