so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
he laminated a picture of his dick.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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