I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
