I must be too annoying 4 u.
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Randomize
