Swine flu. Run for my life!
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize