what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
