**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
