Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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