i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
