So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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