So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Randomize
