drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
