Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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