he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
