We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I just want to make out with him forever
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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