I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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