My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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