Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
