I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
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