And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
