Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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