North Korea, Best Korea!
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
