He is such a slut. More and more my type.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
The power of my boobs compel you
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
