CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize