i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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