K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
