You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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