watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize