i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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