hotel room ftw
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
