the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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