I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
