we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
