um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Randomize
