Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
he puts the penis in happiness.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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