I need help removing her.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Randomize
