So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
