idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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