did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
