You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
