dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
