ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
