you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
