Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
