ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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