He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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