If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
